Are you a 'Peter' or a 'Judas'?

ARE YOU A ‘PETER’ OR A ‘JUDAS’?

Mario D’Couto

            It is quite interesting to note the personalities of Peter and Judas in reference to the way God and the enemy (Satan) deal with us. To some extent, in some way, we fall under either of the two categories. Let’s take a look.

            Peter and Judas were similar in many ways, including the fact that they both rejected Jesus in the crucial last days of His life. And yet, the two men had a fundamental difference. Judas never longed to know Jesus in the manner Peter did. Judas was not founded or rooted in Our Blessed Lord. While at prima facie, it appeared that he (Judas) loved Jesus since he had left all to follow Him, travelled in His constant companionship, stayed under the heat of persecution, cast out devils, healed the sick and preached the Gospel (remember Jesus sent out the 12 to preach, heal and deliver, not the 11 – all His disciples were included), his sacrifices were not out of love for Jesus or out of a revelation of who He was but rather he had his own agenda from the start. We come to know his character from the following statements, “What are You willing to give me if I …..” (Matthew 26:14). He lied and flattered to gain advantage (Matthew 26:25). He took money from the treasury of Jesus’ ministry for personal use (John 12:4 – 6). And the list goes on. He never knew the Lord even though he spend three years in His company. Nor did he ever repent of his self – seeking motives. Another interesting point to take note of is that while both were sorry for what they did to Our Blessed Lord in the last few hours of His life, both had contrasting ways of making things right. Judas did not have the foundation Peter had.

            When Judas realized his mistake, he became remorseful and brought back the thirty pieces of silver to the chief priests and elders, saying “I have sinned betraying innocent blood.” And they said, “What is that to us? You see to it!” Then he threw down the pieces of silver in the temple, went away and hanged himself.

            The difference between Judas and Peter was this; Judas was remorseful and knew he had sinned. But he did not know the Christ. He had no understanding of the magnitude of whom he had betrayed. He only said, “I have betrayed innocent blood.” If he knew the Christ as Peter did, he would have gone back to Him and repented, knowing the goodness of the Lord. Committing suicide was yet another act of living independent of God’s grace. The shaking revealed Judas had no foundation, even after following the Master for three years.

            Judas never hungered to know Our Blessed Lord because of which he did not come to know Who He truly was: If Judas ever knew Who Our Blessed Lord truly was, he would never have betrayed Him. When a strong storm attacked his life, everything was shaken and blown away!

            There are so many people who say a lot of prayers and maintain the practices of piety but if it is not based or rooted in love for God, the moment when tragedy strikes, such people begin to sulk and grumble against God. If we look at the life of Judas, it seemed like whatever he did, was with the sole purpose of what he can get rather than really appreciating the call that was offered to him from Our Blessed Lord. It kind of reminds me of today’s modern-day relationships where most couples get into a relationship, thinking about what they can get rather than truly loving the other for who they are.

            In other words, our relationship with God is a reflection of how we relate with other people. To truly love someone genuinely means to will the good of the other and that means loving the other in his or her entirety, for who they are as a person, created in the image and likeness of God and not just what you can get from them. When manipulation becomes the subtle norm in a relationship, it would either end up becoming superficial or it would not be there anymore.

            Using the insights from St. John Paul II in his book, “Theology of the Body”, Dr. Edward Sri explains how a lot of modern-day relationships are like today. This is how he explains it,

“It can happen that, for example, Bill and Sally have sex outside marriage and apparently it may seem as though it does not matter because either ways, Bill and Sally are, both, benefiting physical pleasure. Does this sound like willing the good of the other? Far from it.

          The reason as to why this approach is not right is because once the thrill and the pleasure fades out, you will begin to look for someone else to replace it. St. John Paul II likens it to prostitution. Consider a businessman who has a relationship with a prostitute on a certain night every week. The man desires the sexual pleasure she can give him, and the woman desires the money he can give her. They each have self – serving aims that come together in the sexual act and benefit the other person. They each get what they want and in the process, they meet the other person’s desires.

          However, the moment they cease to be mutually advantageous to one another, what do you think will happen to the relationship? If a richer man can pay the prostitute more on that particular night of the week, she likely will leave the first businessman for the wealthier one. On the other hand, if the businessman no longer finds the prostitute ‘pleasurable’ and meets a younger, more attractive prostitute, he likely will leave the first for the younger one.

          This may seem like an extreme example but how many male – female relationships today are not much better than this? How many relationships are based on a mutual use than on a committed love and a true communion of persons? For example, how many young women have sex with a man for the emotional security of having a boyfriend or for fear that if they don’t do this, the many may break up with them? How often does a man just want a good – looking woman to sleep with for the physical pleasure he may derive from the relationship. These are not relationships of authentic love that bring people in communion with one another. Those are simply more socially acceptable forms of mutual use – but still similar to prostitution.”

            How often do we treat God like a vending machine? We turn to God only when we need Him and if our need is fulfilled, we later forget about Him or if we don’t receive what we ask for, we sulk and grumble. Sure enough we cannot ‘will’ the good of God for God Himself is the source of all that is good. But we can reciprocate our love for God by the life that we live through our obedience to Him and by treating other with genuine respect and love. In fact, every action of ours can be an act of offering to God. So even our daily offerings can be an offering to God.

            We cannot love someone if we do not know that person. If one wants to truly love the other, to will the good of the other, he/she needs to spend time with that person. It’s the same in our relationship with God.

            Our Blessed Lord said, “Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friend.” (John 15:13) We cannot lay our lives for someone we do not trust and trust is built only over a period of time. It cannot happen overnight.

            We cannot lay down our lives for God unless know we Him well enough to trust Him. We must know and understand the nature and character of God. We must have the assurance that He would never do anything to harm us.

            He always looks out for what He knows is in our best interest. What may look like a disappointment to us will always turn out for our good if we do not loose faith. God is love; there is no selfishness or evil in Him. It is Satan who desires to destroy us.

            Often we view situations in our lives through short – range glasses. This distorts the true picture. God looks at the eternal aspect of what we go through. If we look at situations only from our limited vantage, 2 things can happen,

Ø  First, in the midst of God’s purging process we will be easy prey to offense, whether it be with God or one of His servants

Ø  Second, we can easily be decried by the enemy

            Satan will use something that seems right at the moment, but his ultimate plan is to use that to our own destruction or death. When we are settled in trusting God, we are not moved from the Father’s care. We will not succumb to the temptation to care for ourselves.

            The enemy, who is the father of lies has been crafty and shrewd from the beginning and one way does this is by perverting or distorting God’s character. When our first parents sinned, they were ‘talked’ into thinking that God was curbing their freedom since it seemed like He did not want them to be happy. Notice how in Genesis 3:1, the evil one asks, “Did God say you shall not eat of every tree of the garden?” Through this question, he is insinuating a sense of doubt in our first parents and making it sound like God is the villain and he is the hero; that God does not want us to be happy and when Eve says that they are allowed to eat from any tree except this one tree because if they did, they would die, that’s where he begins to limit God’s character saying, “You shall not die for when you eat, your minds will open and you will be like gods, knowing good from evil.” The entire passage can be seen in Genesis 3:1-7.

            In essence, what this means that the serpent was saying to Eve is this, “God is withholding everything good from you.” But God’s emphasis was, “You may freely eat except …” God had given humankind the entire garden to enjoy and all the fruit to eat with the exception of one.

            From the above, we see how the serpent was distorting the relationship between the woman and God by saying, “God doesn’t really care for you. What good thing is He keeping back from you? He must not love you as you thought. He must not be good God!” She was deceived and believed a lie about God’s character. The desire to sin was then aroused because God’s Word was no longer life but law.

            The enemy still operates this way today. He perverts the character of the Father in His children’s eyes. We have all had authorities over us such as teachers, bosses or governors who could have been selfish and unloving. Because they are authority figures, it is easy to project their nature onto God’s character since He is the ultimate authority.

            When you know God would never do anything to harm or destroy you and whatever He does or does not do in your life is in your best interest, then you will give yourself freely to Him. You will gladly be one to lay down your life for the Master.

            If you have given yourself totally to Jesus and are committed to His care, you cannot be offended because you are not your own. Those who are hurt and disappointed are those who have come to Jesus for what He can do for them, not because of who He is.

            When we have that attitude we are easily disappointed. Self – centredness causes us to be short-sighted. We are unable to view our immediate circumstances through the eyes of faith. When our lives are truly lost in Jesus, we know His character and share His joy. We cannot be shaken or shipwrecked.

            It is easy to become offended when we judge by our natural surroundings and circumstances. This is not seeing through the eyes of the Spirit. Often God does not answer us in the manner or amount of time we feel is absolutely necessary. But if we look back and try to analyse, we will see His wisdom.

            It’s like dealing with children. I remember how as a small boy, whenever we would go for shopping and if ever we passed by a toy shop, I would pester by dad to get me a toy that I like. There have been occasions where even though my dad had the money, he would not buy it for me. Of course, I would sulk and grumble but I’m glad my dad did not give into my cravings because had he done that, I probably would have grown up to be a spoilt brat (of course, he was a great man of wisdom and he did give me many good things on many other occasions). It’s the same with how God relates with us as Robert A. Schuller writes in his book, “What happens to good people when bad things happen”, “God does not give us what we want but what we need.” In such situations, it is best to say, “Lord, I trust You, even though I don’t understand.”

            In Hebrews 11:35 – 39, we find the record of those who never saw the fulfilment of their promise from God and still never wavered, “Others were tortured, not accepting deliverance, that they might obtain a better resurrection. Still others had trial of mockings and scourging, yes, and of chains and imprisonment. They were stoned, they were sawn in two, were tempted, were slain with the sword. They wandered in sheepskins and goatskins, being destitute, afflicted, tormented – of whom the world was not worthy. They wandered in deserts and mountains, in dens and caves of the earth. And all there, having obtained a good testimony through faith, did not receive the promise.”

            They had decided God was all they wanted, no matter what the cost. They believed Him even when they died without seeing the promises fulfilled. They could not be offended!

            We are rooted and grounded when we bear this intense love and trust in God. No storm, no matter how intense can move us. This does not come by strong will or personality. It is a gift of grace to all who place their confidence in God, throwing away the confidence of self. But to give yourself in total abandonment you must know the One who holds your life.

            Grace is given to the humble. Humility is a prerequisite for grace. Trials in this life will expose what is in your heart – whether the offense is toward God or others. Tests either make you bitter toward God and your peers or stronger. If you pass the test, your roots will shoot down deeper, stabilizing you and your future. If you fail, you become offended, which can lead to defilement with bitterness.

            Many people have experienced hurts and disappointments that are less extreme and some that are more. Many become offended with the Lord. They believe He should take into consideration all they have done for Him. But, they are serving Him for the wrong reasons.

            We should not serve the Lord for what He can do but rather for Who He is and what He has already done for us. Those who become offended do not fully realize how great a debt He has already paid for them to be free. They have forgotten from what manner of death they were delivered. They see through natural eyes rather than eternal.

            Offenses will reveal the weakness and breaking point in our lives. Often the point where we think we are strong is our place of hidden weakness. It will remain hidden until a powerful storm blows away the cover. In short, we can do nothing of eternal value in our own ability.

            So coming back to the question, “Are you a ‘Peter’ or a ‘Judas’?” I think we have enough material to understand and situate ourselves as to under which category do we fall and so I would like to end with 3 questions,

1.      Am I humble enough to accept God’s will for my life or do I want to live my life on my own terms?

2.      Do I love, respect and honour God for Who He is or do I treat Him like a ‘vending machine’?

3.      Am I happy, content and thankful to God for whatever I have in my life or do I sulk and grumble against Him for the things I don’t have?